Day 13: Distrusting People Around You

Within this post I’ll explore another mind-pattern that comes up often within interaction, living and co-existing with people: Distrust towards others.

How is Distrust towards Others created?

For example–you had an experience where someone did not do something exactly as he promised to do it. Within that you judged this person as someone who’s word is questionable. This can be a very small thing, like for example omitting something within ones house duties that are arranged with others that live with you.

This judgement was not released through self-forgiveness. Steps have not been applied within physical reality to resolve this point within what’s possible to establish with another and within the context and severity of the problem that came out. Instead what you left carrying after this event is a negatively charged past moment memory where another is to blame.

When something similar happens with the same person, or even a completely different person, you’ll immediately access/recall this past moment judgement and add onto it.

Within this you’re creating a network of thoughts and beliefs within your mind that contains and imprisons people around you into predetermined picture/image representations within and as your mind. Within this you’re creating an alternate reality and you will use this alternate reality to make assessments and decisions within the real physical reality. And since your starting point is coming from a make-belief world your results will be unexpected and consequential for you and others.

How does the make belief reality within your mind influence your interaction with the real world?

Your thoughts, beliefs and backchat about others create a lens through which you look at the outside (as well as inner) world. This lens though distorts what you see, so the starting point of your decisions and assessments about your world and others within it will be distorted as well. Thus it is important to stop the creation of these lenses–the make belief worlds where you create virtual reality representations of others within your world.

Self-forgiveness on Creating Alternate Mind Realities within and as Yourself where You Doubt and Distrust Others Based on Past Moment Memories

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing to use past moment memories of someone not doing exactly what he said he will do, to create a mind web of thoughts, beliefs and backchat about and directed towards another or others, in which these beings are entangled and frozen in space and time and negative or positive energetic charge is assigned to each and every one of them, as well as attributes, like in a virtual reality game, so as to define them and imprison them so that one does not have to work with these being real-time, here in the physical reality, but rather defer to and yield to the comfort of one’s thoughts where one does not have to practically act and direct oneself and others within the physical reality one participates in and is responsible for.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing to distrust others and immediately invalidate what they’re saying, doing or suggesting towards me or towards others through accessing and relying on the perception of them through a lens created through categorizing and building thoughts, beliefs and backchat about and directed towards these beings within and as my mind during the course of interaction and physical participation with these beings as I experienced internal or external conflict in relation to these beings.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing to feel uncomfortable around others and blame others for this self-created internal experience as I am not really participating with other physical beings made of flesh and bone here with me but rather I am locked and imprisoned within my mind with the representations and mind virtual reality characters based on these real human beings I have created in order to avoid to really get to know these people or any other people as that requires time, patience, effort, social skills, skills of problem and conflict resolution.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing to fear others because I denied myself the opportunity to really get to know them and understand them on an intimate physical level within conversations and interactions with these beings and instead of looking at practical ways how I can move within this point I fled to my mind out of fear of this being too difficult, too overwhelming for me and as such compromise myself and others through living in denial of myself and others and who we really are and the potential we have that needs to be nurtured and cared for and expanded and lived into being so that we do not have to fear each other and self as we live in understanding of each other and self.

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Day 12: Final Flag-Point: Consequence

the-footbridge-1436278-mIn our journey through the pattern of blaming someone for ones own internal experiences we have thus far looked at:

  1. Overview of a mind pattern
  2. Example of a mind pattern play-out
  3. Flag point no. 1.: Creation
  4. Flag point no. 2.: Buildup of Energy and Reactions

Now it’s time to look at the last self-supportive flag-point: consequence. Yes indeed, we’re going to approach consequence as something we can utilize–and make the best out of it–so to say–instead of wallowing in a sorrow, guilt and regret of what has already been done.

Let’s start with an example: You’ve walked the process of creating a mind pattern through first labeling your colleague as inferior to yourself within his application of his skills in relation to work you do together. You’ve participated within this mind pattern for a while, blaming your colleague for the “hardship” you experience over time, having to put extra effort into correcting your colleague, making sure the projects you work together on are up to your standards. The severity and intensity of the thoughts, energies, emotions and feelings you now hold inside you expanded and keeps expanding. This resulted in multiple arguments with your colleague where you raised your voice, expressed your blame and went all the way to be nasty, within your words, towards this another human being. The last argument was so intense, that after it you no longer speak to your colleague. You try to distance from him as much as possible as well as from the work you used to do together with him, no matter the consequences for others in and around your workplace who depend on the work you and your colleague used to do.

The consequence flag point within this story are the following physical reality play-outs you’ve participated within:

  • loosing your temper within arguments with your colleague, being nasty within your words towards him
  • trying to distance yourself from this colleague so as to cut all ties with him
  • letting go your responsibility for the work/projects you used to do together

Can you see how these detrimental physical play-outs have been created and manifested through your mind, through allowing your reactions to fester and get stronger? Since the outcomes of your irresponsibility and inability to deal with your own reactions inside you as emotions and feelings have now become physical, we’re talking about consequence. It is something that can not be taken back. The deeds have been done, the words have been spoken and these will generate further consequence. Thus, it is in ones best interest to catch a developing mind-pattern/reaction/emotion/feeling before it reaches the stage of consequence within your and others world. We’ve looked at this ability in the previous post.

However, sometimes, especially at the beginning of your “process”, you’ll only realize yourself within and during when the consequence takes place. So it is necessary to learn to learn from this consequence, see it for what it is, understand how it was created and align oneself to never again allow and accept to create such a consequence–or any other consequence–again.

The “gift” within consequence–if and when you stop yourself and decide to take a good hard look at yourself and your participation–is that you’ll see all the reactions/emotions and feelings you’ve participated in clearly – as they are the ones raging within you at the very moment and were present all the time as you’ve created your consequence. Then you simply walk the the process of identifying the flag-points within a mind-pattern backwards:

  1. Identify what emotions and feelings you currently participate within, the ones that are the most prominent ones.
  2. Look at and backtrack how and through what participation, physical or mental, you’ve intensified and built these emotions and feelings.
  3. Finally identify the first moment of creation of this particular emotion or feeling. Where and when it is and how it was that you identified yourself with and convinced yourself that you have the right to feel this or that way, instead of facing your problem practically and directly and afterwards letting it go completely.

Once you identify the above points, you apply self-forgiveness on these points. Check out the list of the previous posts in this series for examples of the application of self-forgiveness (the list is at the beginning of this post).


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Day 11: Flag point no. 2.: Buildup of Energy and Emotion

We looked at the creation, the beginning stages, of forming a detrimental mind participation pattern. Now we can progress to our flag point number two. This is where we deal with thoughts that are being constantly charged and as such are becoming more prominent, concrete. Let’s dive into self-support through self-forgiveness right away:

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing to participate in a buildup of energy as emotions and feelings within blaming someone else for my own negative internal experiences.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing to willingly participate in a self-compromising pattern of building and festering something that I know will have a detrimental effect on myself, my world and others within it, yet I was still unwilling to stop myself due to my self-righteous belief that I can not possibly resolve my own negative internal experience I have in relation to another unless the other is first dealt with/punished/removed from my reality.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing to blame others that do not want to accommodate me within my desire to remove someone from my reality and within that judge them as being and causing the same problem as the original person I have a problem with and within that further compromise my relationships with and my responsibility towards others and within this become evil much greater than the person that I wanted to remove from my reality originally due to me blaming and judging this person for creating consequence and being a detrimental factor within the reality I live/participate in.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing to deny myself the gift of and the simplicity of simply not participating within thoughts that come up within my mind during and after situations/moments within my reality where friction arises during physical participation within the same space with others.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing to forget that I am here breathing and able to physically move myself and I do not have to remain stuck in blame and past moment memory of experiencing a negative energetic reaction within myself with and during participation with another where I perceived this person attacked, lied, deceived or was manipulative towards me.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing to not realize that by holding onto the past moment memories of what others did or did not do to me within a negative/detrimental/consequential context I am wasting and compromising the present moment, the responsibility I have for myself and how I conduct myself within this world as well as compromising any chance for physical resolution of the problem with another that is bothering me.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing to compromise the walk/journey towards a solution with another through me being reactive and unwilling to let go of and forgive within and for myself the past and the past moment memories I hold against another.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing to instead of focusing my mind onto finding practical physical solutions for problems that I am experiencing with another, waste my energy within being angry, judgmental and nasty within my mind towards another.

Posted in 7 Year Journey to Life, Energy, Mind Consciousness Systems, Process, Self-forgiveness, Self-movement | 1 Comment

Day 10: Self-Support with Flag-points within Blaming Someone

Having identified three major flag-points within the process of blaming someone (for ones own internal experiences) we’re now going to look at how to support oneself with some common sense tools to face this point effectively, recognize the mind pattern as it comes/emerges again and learn from it so that we do not repeat the same mistakes over and over again.

Self-supportive flag-points within the point of Blame towards Another

Self-supportive flag-points within the point of Blame towards Another

I’ve prepared a simple illustration (above) of the points we’re looking at. Notice how the intensity of the self-experience (of blame) gradually grows and intensifies as one is participating within the mind-pattern/thoughts/emotions/feelings/beliefs/projections towards another. This is generally how most patterns play out – as you participate within such a mind pattern it grows and intensifies in strength over time. This is a crucial point to understand and identify within yourself. If some reaction as emotion or feeling is taking over you and growing stronger over time, you HAVE to stop and assess your situation and remediate. Otherwise you’re going to cause consequence for yourself and others as you’ll eventually act out, snap out and/or get possessed completely and loose most and/or all of your self-control when you expect it the least.

First Flag-Point – Creation

This is the start. This is the first occurrence of a reaction as a thought/image within your mind that is energetically charged as a particular emotion or a feeling. It can be very subtle. Yet it is of the utmost importance that you learn to recognize and identify these subtle reactions within yourself and work with them through self-supportive writing and self-forgiveness. If left unchecked, these reactions will grow.

For example: You come into a situation with your work colleague where you have to correct this person and/or help this person to correct something, say a project you’re both responsible for. The moment of creation of the problem within this point would be where you judge your colleague as less than, as inferior to you within his skills and his application due to you having to correct him.

Let’s immediately correct this judgement utilizing self-forgiveness:

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing to judge another for what I perceive as lacking skill or skills that I believe are inferior to mine.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing to judge another as being lazy, untrustworthy and generally a bad person due to this person missing something and/or making a mistake within a project/effort we participate/participated together within and as.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing to through my judgements towards another make myself superior to this person so as I do not have to look at and correct my own shortcomings within the actual skills or the lack thereof I see within another and/or within the way I deal with, interact and handle this person.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing to compromise the actual project as a point of effort that someone else is waiting for/is depending upon through me not being an effective part of a team, a part that can work with other parts even if these other parts (people) make mistakes or omit stuff.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing to access the point of self-righteousness and make the situation of having to assist and correct someone within a point of co-working all about myself and my own internal experiences of hardship, unfairness and having to do “something extra”.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing to perceive me doing something extra, something that I did not initially expect will have to be done and react to this fact and instead of working and conducting myself effectively within the now changed situation, I went into a point of reaction and emotional possession where I blame another for that the point did not go “my way”, did not go as expected.

In the following post we’ll look at the other two flag points we’ve identified within the series of these mini-articles. Thanks for your attention.

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Day 9: (Continued) Blaming Someone for Ones Own Negative Internal Experiences – A Practical Example

fightIn the previous post I diverged a bit from the point that I intended to share. It was still a general introduction to what a mind pattern is and how it works, instead of a concrete example as the title suggested. In this post I’ll thus get more specific and describe a common situation that can arise within ones mind and physical participation – blaming others for what one is experiencing within and as oneself.

My own experience is that dealing with other people is one of the most challenging parts of existing within this world as a human being living in a fairly stable situation where the basic necessities of life and living here are met. Within this living, living alongside and with, interacting, sharing problems and solutions with other people – conflict, misunderstanding and tension can easily arise and be fueled and made worse by the parties involved.

Being able to deal with these friction situations arising between oneself and the other human beings is thus a very important skill, a very important part of oneself that one has to develop in order to function effectively and to ones full potential within this reality.

Example of a common pattern of a development of blame towards another

Imagine you’re working with someone on a project. Your colleague submits his work to you. You find that he made many mistakes within the submitted work. Within this moment, at this stage of this play-out, you might find a backchat developing within your mind. Thoughts like “Oh no, not again. This person is being lazy, unreliable and unprofessional again. What this person does is compromising this project and since I am involved it is also compromising myself as the results of this project will reflect on me as well. I now have to put extra effort into assisting this person to fix his mistakes. Maybe I’ll even have to do some of the work myself for this person. I do not like this!”.

Put a flag-point here for yourself. As we have identified the first moment of reaction. The first moment where we accessed reactions within ourselves and where we have charged emotions and feelings within ourselves and allowed them to influence and shape our thought pattern, our stance and standing within this situation. We’ll get back to this flag-point later and reveal a solution, show ourselves the practical, non-consequential approach to be taken in the moment like this – but, now – we’re going to continue with our example.

You approach your colleague with the problem of his work not being up to standard, containing mistakes and explain what has to be fixed and how. Your colleague nonchalantly agrees and promises to fix his mistakes and get back to you soon with the result of his work.

Some time passes by and you’re handed your co-workers work again. After reviewing it you see it still contains some of the very same mistakes and problems you have identified and explained how to deal and fix them to your colleague before. Now the mind rages: “Damn it! I knew I can not trust this person. This is unacceptable. This person is making my life miserable. Now I have to go back again to this person and repeat myself. This is not fair. I’ve got more important things to do than baby-sitting this person. This person should be fired! This person is useless!”.

Here we place our second flag-point. Within our latest backchat we can see that we have stepped up from the last time, we have intensified the reactions as emotions and feelings. Anger is present. “Solutions” are presented by the mind where the other person would be “dealt with” or even “punished” for his misbehaving.

Continuing with the story two co-workers that does not seem to get along with each other:

Fast forward and the project has been finished and submitted to your superiors. After many times getting back to your colleague you finally managed to get the project into a shape you’re fairly satisfied with and thus this chapter/incident is seemingly over. What however remains within you is intense negative charge, backchat, a belief and an impression of your co-worker – as an unreliable, untrustworthy and compromising factor within your world/existence.

Here we place our third flag-point. This intense negative charge towards another that you accepted and allowed to be born and to get stronger and stronger within yourself will now carry within you and influence and direct your whole beingness and participation, especially towards further future dealings with your colleague, but not excluding other people and situations within your work and personal life that will resemble the points that you’ve reacted to and created a negative emotional charge towards/to within the example described.

In the next post we’re look again at our three flag-points, put them into a self-supportive context and advise on what can be done at each of the important junctions within ones participation in order to be effective within dealing with situations of friction and conflict with others.

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Day 8: Blaming Someone for Ones Own Negative Internal Experiences

Fractal FlowerWelcome to the domain of the mind, where the mind will throw at you and lock you into one it’s favorite creations – mind patterns. And within this the mind will let YOU do all the work. Within this fascinating process – with horrendous results – of creating and participating within a mind-pattern, you’ll put together past moment experiences as memories into brand new combinations. The result of this haphazard self-manipulation is the creation of a belief. A specific belief about yourself. A belief that you’ll save within your body and mind and later, when the outside or internal conditions are right, access it, to deceive and compromise yourself within your participation within this reality. Though, within your self-righteousness, you won’t think and consider and deem this participation as self-compromising, detrimental to yourself and others or just as plain abuse. You’ll believe your actions are perfectly justifiable.

There – in the few short sentences, you travelled through a simplified timeline of events that the creation, storage and participation within a mind-pattern will take you through.

We now know that these mind-patterns are not particularly fun to be a subject to. We want to direct these manifestations, understand them, forgive them and direct ourselves effectively to not fall for the same bait again. The bait of such a mind pattern is an easy, familiar solution to a situation that presents itself and that we react to and/or are not sure how to direct. Within such moment the mind will present it’s bait: “Look at this shiny, comfortable though-path you can take. You’ve been there before. You’re the righteous one on this path. Just go for it!” It sounds almost like an advertisement on the TV. And what do we know about advertisements in TV? They always lie, they present the product and it’s effects in a sugar coated illusionary reality that the consumer simply can not attain. Yet the promulgation and the incredible sums of money spend for advertising prove how effective it is.

Just like TV advertising, our mind patterns that the mind ever so frequently presents – are extremely effective in misleading one from the simplicity of assessing one’s reality within the stability of ones breath, within the absence of energetic reactions as emotions and feelings. And here is another parallel with the advertising industry. Many designers and producers within this field would tell you that for an advertisement to be effective, it has to generate a strong emotion or trigger a particular feeling within the viewer. The same applies to mind-patterns. Energetic experiences are always present when one participates within a mind-pattern.

The presence of reactions as emotions and feelings you can use to your own benefit! What do you know when you experience these reactions? Yes – I am participating in a mind pattern. I need to stop, stabilize myself and identify this pattern.

First you’d start with writing down your experience. We’ll explore this application within the following post. See you then.

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Day 7: Swallowing the Bitter Pill of Realization that One has Abused Something or Someone

bulletIf proper care is not taken before and whilst making a decision within one’s world and reality, like I’ve described in my previous post, one is inevitably going to abuse/compromise part of oneself or another person. Why is that?

Decisions are like bullets. If one’s aim is off, if one’s concentration is lacking or is influenced (by a substance) – one is going to miss the target. A bullet, just like a decision, carries within itself a great amount of force/energy. If this energy is misdirected, if it misses the target it can inevitably hurt someone or something, which was not the shooters direct intention. However through not being stable within one’s decision – the starting point of shooting the bullet – the shooter did in fact decide to be careless about his shooting and thus he already made a decision to miss. Even though this self-compromising and others-compromising decision was/is not so apparent to the one making a decision – the shooter as used in this metaphor – it still is a fact of physical reality and it can not be taken back.

Once the reactions dissipate, once one realizes the damage that one has inflicted due to one’s carelessness and refusal of first stopping oneself and allocating oneself as a point of absolutely stability and trustworthiness that can stand as the decision about to be made till the end of time – then and only then the bitter realization comes of what it is one has in fact participated within.

One can obviously deny the responsibility for the consequences of one’s actions/decisions. However this writing will only continue to make sense for those that are actually able to stop at least at the point where they’ve caused a problem/damage and are willing to assess their participation self-honestly within the absolute decision to change so as to never again repeat the same mistake, as one realizes the responsibility one has for oneself and everyone else whilst being an active participant within this reality. So those that deny, disappear now, like a smoke from a fired gun – as what follows you won’t be able to comprehend.

Once the smoke has cleared once again – the metaphor that is used for one’s energetic reactions as feelings and emotions not being so prominent – for a moment – once this takes place one has to use this opportunity to self-introspect and identify the mind pattern that one has fallen into, that one has charged and identified oneself with and as. This pattern is the “toxic substance” that influences and debilitates one’s concentration and will inevitably lead to a decision based on a lie. A lie that one has created and substantiated for oneself. A lie that is constructed from one’s thoughts, beliefs and backchat about one’s reality. A lie that is fueled by one’s self-interest that ignores the facts, the situation on the ground, in order to get what one wants by all means necessary.

Such a pattern will have many faces/manifestations.

In the next post, we’ll look at an example of such a patten: “Blaming someone for one’s own negative internal experiences”. Stay tuned.

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Day 6: Making Decisions in the Quicksand of Emotions, Feelings and Reactions

quicksandOne is often – in fact, all the time – in a position where one has to make a decision in relation to ones reality and ones participation within this reality. That is a simple point of everyday life. Within this one has to consider other beings. One has to equate and look at the consequential outflows of the decision or decisions one is about to make. This not an easy process the “bigger” the decisions and the greater the responsibility within ones world is.

In order to walk a decision-making-preparation-process effectively, without compromising oneself and others within ones reality, one has to first asses whether one is stable within ones body. The stability in this case would be the absence of any emotions, feelings or reactions towards the decision one is about to take. One has to ask oneself: “Are there any energetic movements within my body that I detect as I walk the preparation stage of taking a decision? Does something change within me when and as I asses all the outflows of the decision I am about to make? Is this decision something I am creating with full awareness, or is my decision coming and based on an energetic impulse within my body and/or mind?”

The self-honesty (or the lack thereof) within answering these questions to oneself will determine the effectiveness and in fact the very ability to make any decision.

What to do if one “has” to make a decision in relation to something but one realizes one is not stable – that one is in fact reacting to something or someone?

Well then one has to walk an additional decision making preparation step or steps: Tracing, understanding and disengaging the emotional and feeling reactions one has self-honestly detected within oneself.

There are very effective tools at one’s disposal to tackle this remediation phase: Self-introspection as Self-Writing, Self-Forgiveness, Self-Corrective statements.

Let’s walk an example of Self-Forgiveness in relation to the above: “reacting/being unstable within oneself before/during the taking of a decision”:

1. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing to disregard myself and my responsibility within the physical reality I am participating within through not first self-honestly look within myself whether I am completely clear and stable as not being reactive, possessed by an emotion or feeling, before I take or make any and all decisions within my life.

2. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing to abdicate my self-responsibility for myself, my reality and the responsibility towards others within my reality through making decisions based on energetic impulses within and as myself, whether experienced as an energetic rush within the chest area as anger or whether justified as mind creations as beliefs, opinions and conjectures about myself, others and the events within my reality.

3. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing to be impatient with myself within first walking the necessary preparation steps before taking/thinking about making a decision, as the self-stabilization points of self-introspection within self-honesty, self-writing and self-forgiveness.

4. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing to further fuel the energetic reactions within myself as feelings and emotions through being impatient, thus plunging myself deeper and deeper into anger and blame and further and further away from actual real solution of stabilizing oneself before embarking on the journey to walk and solve the points that I’ve identified as problems/problematic within my world.

5. I forgive myself for accepting and allowing to deny the gift of others being in my world, being able to provide a different perspective to and towards problems I am facing as I’ve ignored and rejected their perspective and instead relied on my own decisions made from the starting point of reaction and within and as that abuse the point of standing for one’s decisions as what one is standing for is in fact abusive, compromising and detrimental towards self and others.

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Ballet Director Is Victim of Acid Attack

MOSCOW — A masked man threw acid in the face of Sergei Filin, the artistic director of the legendary Bolshoi Ballet, on Thursday night, leaving him with third-degree burns and possibly threatening his eyesight, Bolshoi officials said on Friday morning.

Read the rest of the story at


What’s the problem here? Why does this happen in the world?

We’re educated into competition from a very young age. The word “sport” for most people means “competition”. Disabling somebody outside of the “game” is then a logical outflow, albeit extreme, of this increasing competition amongst people, whether it is within sport or business or both.

Who’s at fault here? It is not only the perpetrator of this crime. The system we accept and allow as our education, the money system, the games and sports we like to watch and support – this is where we all collectively create maniacs that, in order to succeed, will do anything to oneself or someone else.

What can we do about this? How can we stop such crimes from happening?

We need to change how we educate our children and the very system they will arrive into as they grow up. We need to change it into a system of collaboration and mutual self-support. We need to change it into a system where the word competition is no longer connected to, and/or the synonym to, sport or business.

How can envy exist if the entire concept of comparision of being better than or inferior to somebody within something is no longer fed into the minds of the people through media as senseless entertainment.

How can cheating exist if there is no need and no motivation to win in something or over somebody, when even the games we play are no longer about winning or loosing but avout the participation itself, where the fun is to actually play, and not at the end, where the means justify the ends.

How can crime exist when there is no more poverty or inequality as the very system is based on cooperation and mutual self-support taught as the basis of being human in schools and universities.

The basis for such a system of cooperation and support is the Equal Money System. Explore this proposal and support it if you can, as the world news are showing us that a change is in order. Together we have the means, so let’s do it!

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Day 5: Backchat in relation to working with others (Responsibility character)

Problem: I’ve participated within backchat in relation to working with another person, where I am not satisfied with the work/part this person is doing/is responsible for.

The backchat started specifically after presenting a point to another that requires change/adjustment. A mundane, repetitive adjustment. I wanted another to do this, while I could have, seeing another does not yet go into the level of specificity and detail, and within that responsibility for one’s work – I could have done this mundane/repetitive part of work/verification by myself so as to make sure the resulting work, which represents the group, is tip-top or at least, actually, conforms to the basic requirements of presenting this work to those that are going to use/utilize/rely on this work.

Another dimension of this point is that I haven’t taken proper time to explain, to this person, why it is what has to be done, what I want this person to do and why it is, from my perspective, responsibility of this person. When I noticed resistance/defensiveness within expressing my point to this being, in a millisecond I decided within myself that it is not worth trying to convince this person/put an effort into continuing this discussion, as it is going nowhere and I do not want to argue, backtrack, explain from beginning, show, walk with this person what I see needs to be done and how it needs to be done. Justified by that I’ve already invested much time into assisting this person, while this being should be self-sufficient and actually helpful within completing one’s responsibilities without others having to watch over one’s shoulder, assist, verify, correct.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing to loose my patience while assisting another with the same or similar point over and over again, in order to align, guide, drive this point to/into a satisfactory result/completion that does not compromise me, another or everyone and anyone else involved as this work is finished with the necessary/required attention to detail, specificity and care.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing to decide within myself to give up on another – and within that actually give up on myself – when I experience perceived difficulty within communicating, working, expressing with/towards another within and as points where one has to take responsibility and complete work that might be perceived as mundane, boring, repetitive, “too much”, where one believes one has better things to do than completing this particular specific work/task/assignment to it’s utmost perfection that is required for this effort to bear it’s fruit as being “good enough” for what it’s meant to be.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing to fear continuing, pushing, assisting, expressing, talking and walking with another when I see resistance arising/manifesting itself within the words/gestures/body expression of another while communicating about a point of responsibility which one or the other has to take and direct in order to complete a particular task/assignment.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing to devise ways on how to do something differently, where I can circumvent another person, when I notice/see/observe/believe this person is creating more problems than actually assisting and supporting the particular assignment/task/responsibility – instead of directing and assisting this person in understanding what and how it has to be done in order to not compromise others or the completion of what it is required to be done.

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing through this circumvention/avoidance of conflict/lossing patience with another actually support and defend the very same construct, within myself, of avoidance of doing something I do not want to do, I resist doing, I believe it’s not my responsibility to do, I want and demand others to do it instead of myself and when I actually, after all, “end up” doing this thing I resist doing, I participate within backchat on how unfair this is, how I do not like what I am doing, how it does not make sense, how inferior others are as it is become of them I have to do this thing that I resist.

UPDATE: Maya pointed out some hidden dishonesties within within my SF statements. Here are the points together with walking the correction:

Point 1

There is hidden judgement in this statement within the words: “same or similar point over and over again”.

So, I would look at where have you not been patient with yourself and whether or not, could you change something within your application, in how you explain the point so that it would be clear to the person. Meaning – if you explained something to someone, let say twice, and the person didn’t get it, see if you can change your approach in giving examples, or showing other options that would make the point clearer.

So, within this SF statement, you have not yet taken responsibility for your impatient but kind of justified it in a manipulative way.

My correction:

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing to go into frustration and blame another when/if I work with another on a similar or the same point repeatedly as another has not yet understood what I am trying to explain and it’s necessary to walk through this explanation for as long and as much detail/effort/me changing my explanation/presentation until mutual understanding is reached.

Point 2

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing to decide within myself to give up on another – and within that actually give up on myself – when I experience perceived difficulty within communicating, working, expressing with/towards another within and as points where one has to take responsibility and complete work that might be perceived as mundane, boring, repetitive, “too much”, where one believes one has better things to do than completing this particular specific work/task/assignment to it’s utmost perfection that is required for this effort to bear it’s fruit as being “good enough” for what it’s meant to be.

There is a point of blame here towards the other where you explain why you THINK the person should take responsibility. So when turning a point back to self, you can look for example – where in your application, you abdicate your responsibilities and are now, projecting the same point you judge yourself for, onto another.

And also – a point that I’m walking for myself is to remind myself that, everyone are walking their process in their own pace and the level of responsibility that each one takes is a direct reflection of where they are in their process. However, if I have backchat towards others not equally participating in the responsibilities in seeing what needs to be done and walk it, it implies that I’m not walking unconditionally because if I had, I wouldn’t have back chat towards any one else.
I walked this point in my blogs:

My correction:

I forgive myself for accepting and allowing to judge myself for not immediately taking responsibility for something I see I can assist with, resist doing it, stop myself from taking this point of self-responsibility and then judge/blame another for not taking this responsibility instead of me.

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